Friday, December 19, 2014

When it Rains it Pours

The bad news continue I spilled coke on my NEW MacBook Air and it died. So upset. Luckily there is not much data yet because it is new. Nevertheless it was a new laptop and on top of that it was a gift from someone who I care super deeply about.

Now, from tears to action. After I did little digging over the almighty internet I found out that rice can help. So, I went to a store bought 20lbs of rice and put my laptop in there. Now, I am waiting. I will keep you guys updated how did it go. This is how it looks like right now.

Anyone had it happen to you? Any idea what can I do? I am travelling tomorrow so if this doesn't work I will take it to the shop when I come back. There is no way that I could do it earlier.

Thursday, December 18, 2014

Now You See Me Now You Don't

     I was posting tons, and unfortunately it came to a break. It wasn't my choice fully, sometimes life tangles so bad that one needs a break to untangle. And that is exactly what happened. Big set of nasty knots to sort our came my way with final exams. The good news is that its over. I managed to survive and learn couple things along the way. 

     One thing that I learned is: your true friends will be there for you. I am very happy and proud to report that all my friends were there for me. So I did make a Ugly Sweater Party as a way to say thank you.
     Second lesson is: Ego is very powerful and it needs to be checked in. Pride comes from big ego, and screws things up. Because of my pride I almost lost one of the best things that happened to me. Luckily, my very straight forward sister from Sweden talked me through the idiocracy of the situation. And this was resolved. Lesson learned...
     Third lesson comes from second: after things went weird with one of my girlfriends, instead of being upset I actually set up a lunch date and talked things through. Before the things went out of hand we did nip the issue right there and there. 
     My fourth lesson isn't lesson per say, but it is an observation. I am very lucky with the people in my life. Even my ex is a good guy. I was hearing so many bad things about so many bad situations. I always knew he is a good guy, that is why we married in the first place. However, when things fall apart usually things get really bad. This is not to say we didn't have couple of nasty moments. WE did. But we survived and now we are friends. I care for him and I know he cares for me. Very lucky. Our daughter sees no drama, hears no drama, speaks no drama. In fact she is a very happy overactive little girl. 
    Lastly, it is December which means end of the year. Time to analyze the passing year, learn the lessons and plan new challenges. This was rough year but I believe that the next one will be better :)
 I always do!

What are your plans for 2015? Any major changes? I would love to hear from you. Please write in the comments section below. 

Friday, November 21, 2014

Saving the Best for Last?

     Being locked in home for couple of days have make my routine slow down. I spent all this time in my pajamas. I noticed that feeling about myself have been lower, I feel more lethargic, and I care less. It makes me wonder; do we feel confident and put our best foot forward or do we put our best foot forward and feel confident?

    In any case once your foot slips everything keep going down. I think once you get off your routine then you feel less and less attractive. I noticed that at home I wear my drab clothes, and my hair is just tied. No makeup nor nail polish to be seen. Then whenever I pass by the mirror my reflection is like my clothes - just sad. It is not easy to feel good about yourself when everything is so sad. It is a downward spiral.

     The same seems to be true just on the opposite side of the spectrum. Once you do care for yourself, you feel better. I know I do. Doing my makeup, doing my nails is the beginning of the journey towards feeling better. Feeling better propels me to do even better. After makeup proper skin care routine comes, and diet. After the trousers become looser, suddenly the gym is not as bad place to be. It seems that either way you go it will be a chain reaction. One pulls the other, we just need to make sure that the chain is going into the direction we want it to go.

     Even if at home, it is important to take care of yourself. Taking care of yourself costs money, but if there is little resources - mini facial at home will help. In fact, this is how I started. There is also groupon where there are coupons for discounted facial and hair treatments. If you have spare dollars, why not? I am sad that I forgot to show little care to myself, but I am happy that I have learned my lesson. I hope you guys won't fall into the same trap. How you take care of yourself always matter - you are stuck with yourself forever - make it to be a beautiful relationship.

     Same is true for clothes; are you saving your very special blouse or a dress for very  special occasion? What does it say? That you are not worth it to wear it? Why not? If the top makes you happy than is should be worn. When you'll be wearing your "house clothes" with hair in a mess,  you will bump into your ex - guarantee!!! Murphy's law. No amount of prayers will save you as he WILL see you. Wouldn't you rather look your best?

Have it ever happened to you? Let me know in the comment section below.    

Thursday, November 20, 2014

Under the Snow

A view from my window.

     I did not write for couple of days despite a promise to myself that I will write one post a day. For my excuse if you watched the news you know that Buffalo is under the snow - literally. So am I. My daughter and I are stuck in home for the third day. Luckily we have the power and the food. I know that in some parts of the city the power is gone. My only issue is entertaining my 5 year old daughter, which is not easy.

     It is November 20th, and we, here in Buffalo, almighty snow breaks in into houses by windows and doors to many houses. The trees are breaking under the weight, and the scariest thing is that very soon the houses will be collapsing in. The snow is very wet and heavy. It all gets me to think how important planing really is. No one had chosen to be stuck at home, but here in Buffalo such possibility exists. We need to plan to have more food then we need, to have water, we need spare generators, and we need shovels. No one could suspect this amounts of snow hitting us but at the same time this is Buffalo and such events do happen time to time and we need to be ready.

Here is how it really looks like from BuzzFeed

     This events made me think how stupid of me that I have no emergency funds. I know I should have it, but never managed to get around to it. What if my window busted in? I have only foot of snow on it so this time I am lucky. Nevertheless, I live with a little child and access to money is a must. I think it is time for me to really make an effort to have any emergency fund ASAP. The plan is to start selling on ebay some of my stuff. Whatever I make goes to the emergency fund. I shall see how much will I make and naturally I will be writing about my ebay journey here.

Monday, November 17, 2014

First Push is the Hardest

     Things cost money, right? If we don't buy things we save money. Pretty simply logic. This logic somehow stops working with a new venture of ours. I started the blog, but now I need a new computer - mine is 5 years old, which in digital age is equal to million years. Not to mention a digital camera to capture things I would like to show you. These items cost money and right now I shall hold on to them. It's not easy to increase your net worth if you keep constantly spend. Do we truly need the latest items to make our projects alive?

     New things are better things, and as a result we should achieve a better final product. Is that really so? I will write about my blogging since it is my latest project that I am truly passionate about. It is a fact that I could use better technology that I currently own, without a doubt. Such purchase would be about $1000. This amount would be much better if devoted to an emergency fund especially that I d have a little child at home. The true question is: can I accomplish what I need to accomplish with my old laptop? The truth is - yes I can. This got me thinking - are we all perfectionists?

     If we need all the bets tools of the trade to ale something happen, could that be a form of procrastination? They say that body in motion stays in motion, (they = Sir. Isaac Newton). However, if we convince ourselves that we cannot get into the "motion" without new laptop or another fancy tool everything stops. We cannot write a post, we don't have to push ourself. Everything is in a holding state until we get "organized" with the fancy tools. Which would be the very definition of procrastination. Nevertheless, if you understand a true lost in waiting time value , then it is possible that our focus goes from why I cannot do it without the........ to how can I do it with what I already have. This breads action, and as Sir. Isaac Newton already said, an action will equal reaction. The first push is the hardest but then it is rolling. It gets easier every day, I promise. Yu will be surprised how much you can actually do.

I would love to hear from you. Let me know what you think in a comment below.

Sunday, November 16, 2014

Your perfect house - perfect investment?

     I went to a very promising estate sale in my neighborhood. All the houses around are on a smaller side. Around 1500 sft, with a small frond yard and minimal back yard. Quite cute place. As we were turning the street there it was - a huge house directly out of Real Housewives of New Jersey show. It is a beautiful house no doubts about it, but at the same time it looks as if someone has phtoshopped it in. Does not fit with the neighborhood as all. There is no doubt that this was lots of money to have this house build. Gorgeous house but wrong street. It got me thinking - it must have been a huge investment. The one that you will most likely loose money on. Even if the house is beyond fabulous I cannot see how anyone will pay it's true worth when every house around is around $100K. This got me thinking - where is the line between making your house truly yours and what your street can take?      

     Owning a house is a dream come true for many girls. When finally the house lands on your hands it is the very exciting. When I got mine it was a dream come true. It is very tempting to start to customize it just for me. Luckily I must say there was not enough of funds to start doing all I wanted to. There are things we want to do and there is a reality of what makes sense doing. Investing money into my little place makes sense only up to meeting the price of $100K. Naturally, I would like to have the closet of the stars, my shoes displayed properly and a king sized bedroom. Who wouldn't? However, I need to be financially savvy here, if I did all of this then my house value would increase but it would never go above certain level. Most likely less then I have put in. Unless you have your house paid for it doesn't make best sense. It seems that getting an average of the houses on your street and going with you budget until that number, makes most sense. Especially if you think you'll be selling sometime in a future. Maybe a engagement or a baby may make you want to upgrade. Hey, you never know.  

     After doing all the calculations it looks like my renovations should not go above $13'000. Will it get me a closet of starts? Probably no, but at least I will not loose money on sale. Hey you never know, I may get engaged or buy a dog :)

Saturday, November 15, 2014

Emotion$ and $$$

     No one is a lonely island, we are all together connected. We have different types of connections/relationships. It is easy to talk to your friends and partner. It is easy to joke, and even talk about BJ, but for some reasons it is not easy to talk about money. How did we arrive to a point where talking about sexual positions is more appropriate then talk about money?

     I am first to blame, I noticed that it is easier for me to talk about anything then money with my partner. In fact, it is bad to a point that I rather die then say anything. If he asks me how am I doing I either lie or start crying. Shame on me. How immature. This has been going for some time and it makes me wonder why I cannot control my emotions? Are money emotional?

    I think  that money represent to girls security. We certainly don't go and buy the bad ass cars with the shiniest, coolest rims. Nor we use the money to buy obnoxious golden chain either. I think having money means that if a girl chooses to buy the chain or the car she can. There is this underlying feeling of being sure that resources are there. So, if Louboutines will go on sale, we can go and purchase beautiful pair of shoes to walk through life.

     What about if money are not there, and we are living from pay chaeque to pay cheque? Now, the security level is lower since money is tight. The stress is on the rise. However, the next big stress increase will happen the moment something expensive goes wrong; fridge or car. Luckily, most of us have a credit card where we could tap into in case of emergency. What happens if your cards are maxed out?

     Fear is powerful emotion. It can affect not only how we feel but also how we act. Elisabeth Kubler Ros says there are only two emotions: "love and fear." This quote has been repeated by many as ultimate truth. I must say I disagree. When it comes to money fear is true, but love? It seems that when we have fears connected to finances the trouble begin. This is where I am at. This is why I binge eat at night when the fear reaches new heights, I try to calm myself with a piece of chocolate. It works! What happens if you do not have fear? Do you have love for money? I am having very hard time imagining that. Love for money is another beginning of trouble. Neither seems to be reasonable.

     I think the best emotions to exhibit around finances are caution and respect. We ought to be cautions about how much we spend and make sure we have savings. We ought to respect money, invest money and make it work for us if possible. As far as investing, I know I should have started at least 20 years ago. I didn't. The second best time is now, right?

     I am hoping that my fears will go away, and that I will be able to talk about finances freely. There is no shame of having a difficult month, is there? Economy is what it is, for everyone. People in our lives care for us and they will understand it. Many of my friends are probably in the same situation. What if we all fake that we are all good, and fabulous. Go out and have fun as if nothing is going on and charge everything? Then we will be pushing each other into a deep dark hole from where getting out is not very fabulous. In fact, I have a friend who is broke but goes out as if she is fabulous. Once or twice it does not really matter. Life is about celebrating people and events. However, my friend is ordering champagne and expensive foods. She is out every morning to have a breakfast at cool spot. She lives in uber cool part of town, but she cannot afford her rent. She is living a big fat lie. We worry about her, but she refuses to stop. One day she will need to wake up and face the consequences. The worst part is that she pushes her friends to spend money at the pace she does. I refuse to do this, and we no longer go out together. That is a sad part. She is truly fun - she does not need to pretend that she is fun.  Surely, not a cost of digging deeper debt.

What do you think? Do you have emotions associated with money? Which ones? How do you deal with it? Please let me know in the comments below.

Thursday, November 13, 2014

Blessed Routine

      Routine is your friend, I wrote about  how creating a habit will help you . But what happens when you fall of the wagon? I did fall of the wagon and the consequences are that I am so behind with everything. It was just two hours oversleeping and these two hours made my day shift. I hardly managed to get my daughter ready for the yellow bus. I am behind with this post. I am behind with checking stuff, and working on school work. The problem is that is not easy to catch on. The life will not wait.

     I still have to be at 9:00 AM at work, no one cares what time I woke up late or not. My child doesn't care either, she needs her breakfast. My school work needs to be done too, but there is no time. Something's gotta give and it will be my sleep in the end. 

     Question: if I slept some more wasn't worth it? Well, the answer is NO. Unfortunately this kind of sleeping throws my sleeping pattern off too. This way even if I slept more I don't feel less tired. In fact, how often a girl sleeps longer just to wake up with a headache? Beauty sleep isn't that beautiful after all.

     I have to work out some kind of way to wake up on time. I truly need to figure things out for sanity at my house. Do you have any tips or tricks? Please share...

Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Propelling Power of To Do List

     To Do lists - I absolutely love them. Putting down on paper everything that I need to do, everything that I want to do and stuff that I have to do. It relaxes my overworked brain. I used to have daily to do lists, weekly and monthly.

     These days, my life is far from the way I want it. In fact, I am not too happy. Making to do lists got abandoned. Most of my friends are surprised to say the least, that I don't have a scribbled paper on me at all times. I was famous for to do lists, I even had to do of the to do list. Now, I have none. Not even the master goal list. I guess I am going through "no lists" period. Still, I can say there is a connection between a list of tasks and productivity. My productivity is down by 80 percent. In fact, I am doing very little and I am behind a lot. At school productivity means good grade, in business productivity means money. In any case lack of productivity means loosing.

     In addition, there is the aspect of crossing out the line that has been done. It is very powerful, especially if you managed to do more then a half. I feel like getting an Oscar each time I cross out an item. And even if I am yet to manage to complete entire list  I can see the progress. I bet everyone has heard about this famous Harvard study where they asked one class how many of them had a goal list. They found out that only 3% people had such list. The study followed up with the subjects of study 20 years later just to find that these 3% were wealthier than the rest of the class combined.Interesting.

     Recently, I was cleaning my library and in an old book I found a piece of paper with my goals that I wrote at the time when I was teenager. I must say that I completely forgot about it. It has been 18 years after all. Nevertheless, I was speechless when I discovered that almost all that was written on that piece of paper came true. I was not even looking at it.

"If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail" said Benjamin Franklin. We ought to listen to one of the smartest man, major scientist and politician, whose list of accomplishments is beyond impressive. The most importantly I need to listen and get back on my "To DO" horse.

Do you have to do lists? How do you organize them? Please let me know in the comments below.    

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Holiday Dilemma: To Shop or Not to Shop?

     Holidays season is coming with big steps. Holidays is the period that we spend the most, and I am no exception. However, this holidays my situation is exceptional with having couple of bucks to my name. I still want to express how important are the people in my life somehow.
There are couple of things that I could possibly do:

  1. Take out my credit card - since I have relatively good credit score, my credit card interest isn't outrageous. But if I will forget one payment or be late for whatever reason I am sure that will change. Bottom line is that the gifts will be at least double the price.
  2. I could make something for my family, I bake a lot and my bake goods are delicious, so perhaps I could bake cupcakes for everyone.
  3. I could do coupons for babysitting services or ironing clothes. I have seen people doing it and usually the recipients are happy with coupons.
  4. However, after long thought I decided that I will do a big ugly sweater party for all my friends. I will give them my time. Time is more valuable  especially in my case. I disappeared of social scene and I miss everyone of my friends. I will just make sure that the party is super special.      

After all, we have all the celebrations to spend time with our loved ones. To laugh together and spend quality time together. This is what I want to give to my friends and family. I would like to create precious memories that will make us laugh in years to come. In my opinion that is the best gift of all.

Let me know what you are planning to give to your loved ones?      

Monday, November 10, 2014

Budget for Blonde - Do You Really Need It?

     You've gotta have a budget - I hear this form every financial guru out there. Without a budget you will not be able to control your money. So, as a girl who wants to have her finances under control I made a budget. It lives in my excel file, it is color coded with fancy formulas that make the math automatic. There, I can find how much I spend on clothes, and shoes, how much my make up costs, petrol for my car, food and bills. I must say I would give me a very clear picture of my finances. I was very excited. There was a little issue with that budget; I had to feed it detailed numbers constantly. Not too sexy I got bored and eventually irritated so ultimately the project budget got abandoned.

     If you don't know where your money is going how are you going to give direction to your finances I read again. Everyone out there is saying it. Everyone must be right. There must be something up with me. So here I go again, making another excel with all the fancy columns and formulas, making it my own. This time I am putting less of details, I make it pink and pretty. My budget looks good and I am pleased. They say that history likes to repeat itself. They are right. I sicked to budged number two for two months the most. Of course,  this project got abandoned just like a previous one.

     Girl track your money, you ought to know how you spend it - another friendly advice about the same B word. I am so not going this path again. Then I had a thought, perhaps blondes and budgets do not mix well. Perhaps there is some quantum mechanics in universe that pairs blondes with fun and budgets with everyone else. In any case I am not doing it. Period.

     I took a piece of paper instead, and a pen. I wrote down all my bills, all my living expenses. Where I knew the numbers I put them down, where I did not I estimated them. Very simple, almost primitive budget template. My big expenses that come once or twice a year, such as taxes or insurance - I added them up accordingly and divided them by 12. This gives me number that I know I need to put aside in for the big bills. I did it only once, and my life is simple now. Moreover I am able to track my expenses since there is only one expense to track.

     Now, when the cheque comes in first thing I put 10 percent in saving. Second I put aside consolidated big boys (such as taxes, car and house insurance). In addition I put aside estimated utilities, and mortgage.

     The rest I spend - literally. I no longer worry which category this fits. I buy whatever I need to buy, or want to buy. Not tracking every penny, in fact not tracking it at all. I just log in into my bank account once a week to see what is the balance. If it is fat I do not worry, if it is thin I trim my spending. This is it!

On the months that I will have something left over from my utilities (I am yet to see that) I will simply transfer this money into saving. Even if it will be just $ 5 dollars, since these $5's do add up. I wrote how powerful are pennies. In no time they turn into thousands.

    Do you keep a budget ? How do you do it? Please share with me your story.

Sunday, November 9, 2014

Carpet Cents

     There is a carpet in my living room. This carpet and I have a cordial relationship, far from a true love. Since we life only once I want to have meaningful connections with my stuff too. Therefore, I decided to let the carpet go by listing it for sale. I am happy to announce that there is a lady that fell in love with this under appreciated floor covering from my house. She takes the carpet and goes her merry way and I am delighted to have $30 that will go tomorrow to my savings.

 Everyone is winner here, even the carpet :) Which makes me wonder what else I have in my home that I would be willing to part with? Probably, a good walk around will be needed with a piece of paper and critical eye. This ties with my previous post (I walk my talk) $tuff... and the idea of getting rid of things that do not make you happy. The space created will feel better, will make space for new things that we could fill with things that inspire us or give us smile. Moreover, there will be little free time pocket created. One thing less means less items to take care for and clean. Even if it takes just two minutes, over a month these minutes add up to an hour extra. What would you do with extra hour?

Saturday, November 8, 2014


     Our stuff here, our stuff there, our stuff everywhere. It seems that our life are consumed by stuff, after all we need stuff to wear, we need stuff to take care of ourselves. We need stuff to get education, stuff to keep clean our houses, and even stuff to take care for our stuff. Is our stuff consuming our pay cheques?

     The stuff can get out of hand sometimes; my friend, let's call her Anna is a single girl in her 35 year of life. She is quite independent and makes good money. She even purchased her own house. The house is a small three bedroom with finished basement. Everything looks good, right? Well, unlike me, Anna collects EVERYTHING. She buys tons of stuff on the premise that we live only once. This got to a point that she needs a bigger house. Literally, she needs to buy a bigger house to hold the stuff.

     I must admit, even if I collect just dresses I have probably too many of them. Housing my dresses took over my entire attic. Here is the deal, if I turn this attic to additional bedroom. This would increase the value of my house by about $10'000. I could then, rent a bedroom for $300 per month. But I cannot because my stuff is in there.

     Clearly our possession cost us money. Not only if we were to rent the space occupied, but also if you need bigger house because of stuff that means bigger mortgage in addition to bigger property taxes, bigger bills and more maintenance cost. These cost add up, don't they?

     Does it mean that we should live the minimalistic lifestyle? I don't think it is for everyone. I know it is not for me. In my opinion we could find the golden ratio between things that enrich our life and makes us happy and don't consume us. Perhaps putting some sort of rules in place would be helpful. For instance, if you need four pairs of tall boots, have four pairs of tall boots, if you found another one that you absolutely must have. Buy it but get rid of one that you already have. The idea here is that you think about the purchase well, and don't allow situation to be out of control. If you continue to buy tall boots you may end up with 35 pairs. You still have only one pair of feet to utilize them. Moreover, thinking which is the pair that goes onto chopping block may cool down your newly found love.

     It is worth considering to sell your unwanted stuff and make a little extra $$$ for upcoming Christmas. We girls tend to buy tons of things that we wear only once or twice. This is still good stuff, so why not try to sell it? The stuff that you do not sell you could always donate to a good cause and get the tax deduction. Hey, why not? Could you use additional $50 right now?

Friday, November 7, 2014

Find a penny...


     Find a penny pick it up, all day long you'll have good luck - have you heard this saying? It's popular here in America, it is popular in Poland too. We have something very similar there. If pennies bring you luck why don't we bother to pick them up?

     I keep finding pennies, nickels and dimes quite regularly. I must admit however, that 25 cents are rarity. Nevertheless, if my eagle eye spots a penny I will pick it up! Here is what I noticed though; some people look at me in a funny way when I pick a coin up. I wonder why? It is still money, is it not? My friends on the other hand joke about me finding pennies constantly. In fact, some time ago one of my friends, let's call her Magda challenged me on our walk from one bar to another. The challenge was who will find a penny first. She said that I keep finding the pennies because I look for them, which is not true. She figured out if she will look for them too she will spot a penny too. Well, it did not go as planned because it was still me who found the penny.

     I have to admit to something here, I truly believe that finding a penny will bring me luck. I honestly do! I consider myself very lucky girl - it must be all these pennies. Just checked in my lucky penny goblet. This month pennies are worth little above $2.00. It got me wondering, how much would I save in a year? I think I will test this, starting 2015.

     When I visit my friends, I see pennies, nickles and dimes usually in random places collecting dust. I never understood that. It is like treating the coins as if these were not money. It is crazy. How often do you go to buy a coffee or a gum and the checkout bill reads $5.32. What do you do? If you have five dollars you pay with it and dig the $0.32 from the valet. What happens if you keep the change at home? Now, the five dollars is useless because it is not enough. Next you have $20. You know how it goes, once you break your bigger bill it disappears much faster, doesn't it? Having little change on you would not only save the $20, but also would slow down how fast the $20 will be spend since it is still $20.

     Another option for abandoned coins are these machines that count your pennies, that can be found in supermarkets. Collect all your coins in one place and once its is substantial then you can go and exchange for bills. This pleasure will cost you 5%. I personally do not like to get $0.95 per each $1.00. So, I never use it. Also, I never have this much coins around  anyway, as I spend them as I go to save my big guys in my valet.

Here is a kicker: Have you ever heard of compounding interest? If you find pennies to amount of $5 per month. And you were to save it at 5.0% per year for 30 years, here is what would have happen:

  • Now, lets do our calculation: $5 per month per year (5x12 = 60) 
  • for 30 years (60x30 = 1800) would accumulate to $1800. 
  • Therefore this would be 233% return on your investment.
  • There is your Parada purse and Christian Louboutin for pennies a day :)

What do you do with your pennies? Save it or spend it? Let me know... 

Thursday, November 6, 2014

How Much Do You Love Yourself?

     "To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance" - said one of the smartest people I know - Oscar Wilde. Although, there are many positive psychological effects of loving oneself, this time I would like to talk about love and money. Traditionally, when loving someone, we are doing it out of pure heart. If someone is loved for their money then there is tons of negative associations with such love. Opposite is true when talking about ourselves. Spending money on yourself is a sign of self-love; in a positive way.

     Having a child teaches you taking care for a child. Teaches you to try to predict possible bad outcomes and protect your child. That is what mother does. In my eyes mother child is one of the purest of loves out there. This pure love could be a model for "ideal love." You worry about your child future, don't you? Well, the same approach should go towards oneself. Not easy, we girls put everyone ahead of us by some twisted nature. Nevertheless, I think we owe it to ourselves and to our loved to take care of ourselves. That would include finances too!!!

     What do you do when your pay cheque comes? Most people allocate the money towards bills. And groceries, and other necessary or fun stuff. The pay is gone, but at least bills are paid. What about if you took the 10 percent of your cheque and saved for yourself? Pay yourself first - as sign of care and love for yourself. Most of us, especially in today's economy won't become rich from saving these 10 percent. Let's just assume that you'll manage to save over a year only $1200. Again, extremely conservative numbers. Nevertheless, there are couple things that are happening here:

1.) You have learned to live little below your means - very precious lesson.
2.) This habit of saving will translate for bigger cheques in the future.
3.) You are little bit more money conscious.
4.) If anything out of ordinary shall happen you have the money to fix it.
5.) Self esteem grows with the growing value of your saving.
6.) This cash, however little adds to your Net Worth.
7.) You have "F*ck you money."
8.) If you saved tons - you could buy yourself the outrageously expensive shoes that you always wanted.  

     I must be honest here, I myself, just started doing it. I am no veteran to saving my 10 percent. In fact, I cannot at this time save ten percent. However, I am saving, 5%, hopefully will arrive to 10 at some point in near future. Again, it is not a lot, but it is a beginning. In my other post power of habit I discuss how having good habits are like autopilot on your road to better future. This saving every two weeks, or a month is an amazing habit to develop. It is a start of our road to financial freedom. So, girl pay yourself first - ALWAYS! Even if it is just 1 percent. The amount will increase in time and a good habit will form along the way. For us, girls money truly matter ,(another article I wrote on a subject) they are a vehicle to buy time and freedom to do whatever we love. Wouldn't you like to be free? Or freer at least?  

     I know that this pay yourself first idea comes from a book, "The Richest Man in Babylon." by George S. Clason. I did not read the book yet, I intend to. Many people have said that before, and I started to listen. So, idea is not mine, but I am trying it, and loving it so I wanted to share with as many girls as possible. If we girls are financially independent, we will be all better off.

I would love to hear from you. Please let me know either in comments below or connect with me on Facebook: Monokerka or Google+ and tell me your story. Perhaps, you have better ways to do it.

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Time Is Ticking Away

    "Why time is running so fast? Because everyone is trying to kill it!" a joke I have heard couple days ago. Funny? True?

     Time in my eyes is the most precious commodity. I already wrote about value of time here:  you can find the post here . Time is very precious, many people think they understand that. I thought that too. However, if you can notice any sign of procrastination then my friend, I am afraid you don't understand the true value of time. Girls, lets look closely at that time...

     I have to give an example on me only. I am 35 years old, pushing it on 36. I cannot really tell you how many people told me I am still young. Or am I? Lets look at this:

  • to be 40 years there is 4 years and 8 months. 
  • This means 56 months - not too much. 
  • If you count the days left till big four zero - 1677.
That means that in 1677 days I will hit the major milestone of live. There are things that I want to achieve by that time. As I said in the first post about my net worth , I want to be worth at least $100K. I think it is reasonable for 40 year old woman to have a net worth of $ 100K. I fact I think I should be worth 5 times as much, but it is very unrealistic for me. Especially, starting from $ -82K. In any case, to be able to make it I would need to save about $60 dollars a day for all 1677 days. I will see how it goes, I will give my all  and I will be updating you about my journey.

     Nevertheless, if I take this number and write down in my calendar in a form of countdown, tomorrow it will be 1676. In one week it will read 1670, and so on. If you actually, physically see the number going down, it will propel you to action. I know it propels me. I know, every little number crossed is gone forever. If I sat at home and done nothing I just wasted one day of my life. This day is gone forever. My life is now shorter because of sitting on the sofa with ice cream. Not even Ben& Jerry is worth this exchange.

     Does it mean that I have to work like maniac? Well, it depends on what my goals are. Since my goals are not too outrages like become millionaire in 5 years or build a company employing 300 people I can have leisure time. In fact, because time is very scarce I choose wisely my leisure activities. I choose wisely my friends and how I spend time with people who are important to me. I have only 1677 days till 40, and if I decide to give some of this away to friends - you can bet that I will not be hanging out with negative people, or frenemies. Time is precious, spend it with people close to your heart. One side note here: you should be close to your heart too!!!

     Try to count it backwards, day by day until a day you choose and see for yourself the true value of time. I truly would love to hear from you. If you tried this method could you comment below and let me know. Also, perhaps you have other methods of increasing productivity. Please share it with me...

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

Little Black Book Worth Billions

     We go places. we meet people all the time. We observe things, we think things through. Our minds hardly ever stop. A girl's mind is very powerful tool, when used right. What would have happen if instead of obsessing about a guy, we employed our mind to do bigger and greater stuff. Could you have a million dollar brain?

     How many times you are in an elevator, or running for a train when out of blue a super good idea comes to mind? If you think about it, there is a chance that somewhere there was an idea worth a lot. Where is it now? Can you still remember what it was all about?  Yesterday, when walking between buildings at my campus, my brain generated  couple of interesting ideas that could be great blog posts. But where are these ideas now? That is the problem - I don't know. They got lost in a sea of random thoughts. It makes me wonder, could we be loosing valuable ideas all the time?

     Boys have their little black book full of secrets, I think it is the time that we also have a little black book for ideas. This little black book should be on you at all times since the brain works at all times. One never know when a next chapter of your dissertation comes to mind, or place where the perfect plan to solve a complex issue will be born. No fear however, if you have a little black book you can whip it and capture the thoughts right then and there.

Possibly one of the most famous little black books out there - Da Vinci's notebook.

     Have you ever heard that successful people think on paper. I think this phrase was coined by Brian Tracy. What does it mean? Are these people somehow different then you and I? I don't think so. I think putting down our thoughts and ideas in one place is the key here. Most of ideas, are probably just blonde ideas or Utopian plans unless you are walking genius . However, all you need is one good, solid thought to solve the challenge at hands. This one solid thought surely can be found between the fun stuff. What if one of this random thoughts could be the idea? Something that makes the world better place and makes you dollars along the way? Hey, you never know !

I would love to hear from you. Have you had an idea that made your life easier? Tell me your story.

Monday, November 3, 2014

Clothes We Wear - Money We Do Not Have !

     It not a secret that I like clothes. How many girl you know own 240 dresses? I think "like" is understatement here. Last night in bed I was browsing for the latest in fashion as well as who rich and famous wears what. I must admit I spent couple of hours doing that. Then I came to realization that there are more or less two types of girls; one wears muted clothes to enhance herself, and the other wears enhanced clothes. Both ways create the statement but how different of the statement it is. Both ways are fun in their own distinct way. It got me thinking, if a girl wears the clothes that enhance her the clothes seems to be less in number since there is no extravagance. Something alone the line less is more...

     Our income in most of time is limited, so it makes a difference how much we spend on clothes. Our outfits eat up large chunks of our money making our closets fat. But here is a thought, what about the space we store our priced dresses? Real Estate is expensive, right? Could I use additional space for something else? Sure. Preferable as an office for building my business. Or renting it out. In reality, we wear about 20 percent of our clothes 80 percent of time. Does it mean I will tell you or I will start tossing my own pieces? Absolutely no!

     I am convinced that we can achieve a balance. There is no need for drastic actions here. A professional organizer would have us create the famous three piles;
1 Keep
2 Donate
3 Garbage
I would never do such thing. Nevertheless, perhaps it would make sense to decide what it is that you really love in your closet, could be multiples. High boots? Jackets? Dresses? Whatever it is, indulge as much as you can. Buy the pieces that you fall in love with at the very first sight. After all, buying clothes gives us pleasure and for many is a form of exercise - walking miles in a mall. Why not? To save money, scale down on everything else. This way you can have proverbial two birds with a one stone. Or how we say in Poland, "two dinners on one fire." In any case, this way picking just one type of clothing to splurge on, and saving on rest seems to be making most sense to me.

     One word regarding throwing away your clothes; unless the item is no longer wearable DON'T. You paid money for that item, and if you know anything regarding cost per wear - just because you got bored by item does not mean you have to get rid of it. Extend the wear for some nice number that will justify the cost per wear to such position that trashing it would be just fine. If you are bored with the piece that you use to love, go on Pintrest to find new ways how to wear it. Look for some inspiration for new outfits using the piece, or if you are crafty perhaps you could play the designer yourself. Why not?

     A girl must be independent, and the best way is to have money. But not at all cost, we need to live too. Have you ever heard of these people who were living very limited life that after death, usually the relatives discover millions hidden? I don't want to be that person, and I am pretty sure you don't want it either. My idea is that perhaps there is a way to scale down and releasing the financial energy to save, but still using some to live a sweet life....
You live only once! 

I would love to hear from you. Do you have an idea how much do you spend on clothes each year? 


Sunday, November 2, 2014

Money Matters

     Every girl should have some money aside. We all know that but it is easier said then done. There are couple of reasons why saving money it not easy. First of all, there must be enough of pay to save from. Second, even if you put $100 a month in a saving account by the end of the year you have $1200. Not exactly rich, right? Not surprising that if you double the amount still not much improvement. Not the best way to become financially independent. So what is a girl to do? Go and party? Not exactly. It is ALWAYS better to have even $500 then nothing in your account - just in case. But this is not a way to increase your net worth.

     I can save only this little, and it seems hopeless so I started to read everywhere I could find anything about the financial information I could. Here is what I found out I could do. I will invest this money. That is the only thing that makes sense right now for me. If I lose it all that was not a fortune anyway. It seems as more money you accumulate the safer should be investing. Also, most of these advisers strongly suggests to buy your home. I like that idea a lot. Nevertheless, I must say that there are others that are saying that owning your home doesn't make financial sense. I may be conservative, but I am one of these girls that like to know that the roof over my head belongs to me. It's not easy to be moving around with all these dresses.

    Lastly, I would like to add, from my own personal experience. A girl gotta have the "f*ck you money." We get into relationships, and at the beginning everything is perfect. Isn't that always the case? As soon as we are crossing new time marks the relationship may become less rosy. If you moved in together and things go sour, at least you are not hostage to finances. You can move out on your own whenever you please.

     Do you know how much is your Net Worth? If you never calculated it, do it now. Are you happy with what you see? Whatever the number is, that is only a beginning. Every girl should go up and up. I know, that 2015 will be a year of building my Net worth. I would love to be worth 100K in 5 years.
What are your financial goals? Do you have any? If not, perhaps time to start to think about it.
I would love to hear from you. How do you save money? Do you have financial goals?

Saturday, November 1, 2014

Flying High With Broken Wings

     There are days when the universe cooperates and life goes smoothly. Everything is just as it suppose to be. Naturally, there are also days when everything goes up the hill. The simplest of task seems impossible. On these days I want to give up.

     Things happen in life, from a bad hair day and feeling fat, to broken heart by the love of your live or sick child. Sometimes these things are so heavy that going on is almost impossible. I have these days right now. All I want to do is hibernate. How fabulous would be to wake up in the spring when all the bad stuff passed already and smell the roses. Unfortunately, the reality is I need to deal with whatever is on my hands. This time on my hands is a big pile of poo.

     It is not pretty, nor is it glamorous. In fact it is quite unpleasant to be honest. However, a girl gotta do what a girl gotta do. Even if I can think of a billion other things that I would rather do right now. This is shitty period and no amount of whining will make it less horrible. Nor there is a way not to deal with the stuff. I figured out that I will make the most dreaded of task first. If I do it first, then the rest of the day will be easier. To help, additionally I make a countdown, I have to fight until December   11th. So, that means 41 days. By looking at the numbers in my calendar going lower and lower I know, this is the period I need to survive. Only 41 days. The good news - tomorrow will be 40. This helps the mind to deal with the ugly as I know it will end at some point. I just have to take a day at a time and I know day ZERO will come. The wine is chilling in the fridge for that day...

Every girl deserves reward after hard work. Cheers to working girls !!!

I would love to hear from you. Let me know how do you do with stuff that are unpleasant to deal with? Do you move forward or procrastinate? Please comment below. 

Friday, October 31, 2014

Money, Money, Money - Always Sunny In The Rich Man's World...

     Who did not dance to the famous Abba song? Indeed, we did have a ball dancing and playing. Yesterday I read an article in Forbes magazine "Forbes 400: America's  Richest People." The Forbes goes into details about the top 25 people on the list. I read it twice, and this is what I found out:

In the top 25 Richest People in America 2014:
  • 22 Are Man
  • 16 of which are self-made
  • 3 women only
  • Women source of wealth - inheritance
  • Top 3 spots belong to self-made 
Isn't that interesting? Why there are only 3 women up at the top? And why is it that these women inherited money. There is nothing wrong with inheritance. However, I think a picture emerges from this that men tend to be motivated to become rich more then women. Or is it the culture that does not promote women? Could that be that the female attitude towards money has to do something with this?

What would happen if I said I want to be stinking rich? Which in Today's standard is not a joke. The richest have a budget of a small country. This year only the entry to the Richest list requirement is 1.55B ( like in Billions) of dollars. They say that the rich become richer and the poor become poorer. I must say, since I am reading a lot on a subject of money recently I know that it takes money to make money. If the rich have money they invest, and so the money multiply and they become even richer. Does it make them bad? Wouldn't you do the same? I know I would.  
Usually, with this rich getting richer message emotions are little different. The implication here is that the rich are somehow mean and bad people and poor are poor good people. The traces of this attitude could be found in the Bible. With all this associations over our head it is possible to associate bad people with money good people with lack of money. We girls, want to be nice and liked, don't we? 
     Then I had a thought; perhaps our spending patterns may have something to do with it? I am guilty of crazy clothing shopping myself. I collect dresses. There is something magical about a girl in a dress. It is sexy, it is feminine. A dress adds special flare to a date or anything we do. At the same time dresses are easy to wear as only you need to do is add the shoes and bag and viola! Complete outfit in no time. Whenever I see a dress that speaks to me I have to have it. All 240 of my dresses spoke to me at some point and now we are big happy family. Today however, if I was doing a mathematics of the dollars in my closet - my car would have been paid off. Or I could have had a nice sum of cash to invest. Carrie said it right:
Aren't we shooting yourselves in a foot? I know that my 2015 will be no shopping year. This will be an experiment to see how much really a girl could save? Is it substantial enough that the money could be set to grow for us? We will find out...

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Early Girl Gets The Reward

     As every girl I need my beauty sleep. I like sleeping, possibly too much. They say " early bird gets the worm." I say the early bird is very tired. In fact, I do have multiple alarms set on my phone, every five minutes so that I'll at some point wake up.

     On most days however, I will get up early. 60 minutes earlier then my daughter, when the house is quiet. I brew a fresh cup of coffee and start my day. This is what Brian Tracy calls the "golden hour." Please don't get me wrong - I don't like waking up at all. However, if I do, the morning hour of mine is very productive. This idea of famous Brian is truly golden. Just 60 minutes of quiet and focused time can do wonders. This is when I write my blog. This is when I plan my day or week. This is time when I work on my finances. During the day time to accomplish any of those tasks require much more time since million things compete for my attention. In the morning, the power of true focus shines. I get done tons of important things. Not to mention that fresh brain is full of creative juices. The morning is the brilliant idea time - you are much more likely to come up with solution for whatever it is that bother you then at other times. If you lucky enough, that you don't have tons of stuff that await your attention - this hour may by utilize for inspiration. An original idea of Mr. Tracy really - to use the first hour of your day to read something inspirational. I must say though the golden hour however is not the Facebook time...

I think you should try it. Let me know how is it working for you?

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Good Habit Is The Girl Best Friend

     Long time ago I had a discussion with a friend who told me that in his house the dinners are planned something like that:
Monday - pasta
Tuesday - chicken
Wednesday - soup
Thursday - chicken
Friday - beef
Saturday - fish
Sunday - leftovers. 
I was appalled and we had long debate on how not exciting and boring that must be. Naturally, my friends was defending his ways.Needless to say we could not see through the same eyes. That was more than ten years ago. I did not give any thought to the conversation until couple years later. Before I had my daughter, I was working as a manager at a certain company. One of my duties was to be there before the employees to open the offices and magazines up. Every morning as I was ready to leave I would search for 45 minutes for my wallet and my keys. No kidding! Every morning the same!!! Oblivious to the amounts of time I was loosing I went about my happy way. Until I read study on people just like me loosing stuff and constantly searching for it devote about two weeks of their live each year to this nonsense activity. I didn't need to do my math to realize that was true for me too. I was working very hard, two weeks vacation lost because I am stupid? It's ridiculous! The keys and the wallet were the beginning of being organized as well as discovering the power of habit.    

     My mornings at my home were very hectic, especially after I had my daughter. My method now is to simplify and create a system for easiness. For example: morning today is very calm. I wake up at 6:00 AM, go wash, exercise for 10 minutes. Make coffee and utilize my golden hour doing whatever project I am dedicated to at the time. At 7:00 AM I wake up my daughter, prepare her clothes and send her off to wash. I meanwhile prepare a breakfast. The first meal in my house is always the same: its either frozen pancakes that take 45 seconds in the microwave or waffles that I bake every Sunday and freeze. She eats, I put my makeup on. After she is done its time for shoes, doing hair. I dress and we are ready. Outside we go for a bus. All this in 45 minutes. The best part is that I got it down to a system and so: 
I am on autopilot.
Stress is reduced.
My daughter cooperates reasonably.
She knows exactly whats coming.
Time saving.

     After success of building one habit I started working on additional little life improvement strategies. Today, my skin routine is a habit and my skin finally is manageable. My golden hour is a habit, which is amazing regarding building my business.  So far I am working on exercise habit. Its a work in progress at this point I must admit. However, I hope that I'll manage to create a habit so my body is up to its perfection.
The habit of everyday makeup - fabulous. Make sure it goes with habit of removing makeup every night :)

     They say it takes doing something 21 times to create a habit. From my experience I know it takes 30 days. We need to repeat a task 30 times to be able to do it thinking-less. It is a major effort since I must say, the habits we are trying to establish aren't the most exciting. If they were exciting it would not be a struggle, right? Nevertheless, it is worth try especially in bothersome tasks. Skin care and exercise in particular; these little rituals performed every day over long period of time do add up. Think of the bad habits that created themselves out of blue but the consequences over time are damaging. Smoking, drinking, not removing your makeup before bedtime. Does it ring a bell? Create a list of three good habits that you would like to create to make your life easier. I swear very girl should try it.      

I would love to hear from you, which three habits would you like to create. Kindly comment below.

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

No Better Day Than Today


     Worry, worry, worry - every morning, afternoon and evening. Girls have a tendency to worry about everything, but money especially. Will I have enough to cover my rent, will I manage to pay my credit card, will I have money for car maintenance, for hairdresser ect. ect. I am no exception, I worry about my school, about my daughter, I worry about my family members, I worry about bills - you get the picture. Can we somehow stop this ?

     My friend suggested a book to read: "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living" by Dale Carnegie. I started to read and there are couple of ideas how to analyze your worries in a different light. One idea however, got me really thinking. Live in compartments of today. If you take one day at the time then the worry is lesser since it concerns this one day. I must admit I understand the concept only in terms of not wasting time agonizing about future. At the same time, I have to say: today is only a small part of this big picture called life. If we have a big list of goals how reasonable is such isolation? If you fail to plan you plan to fail - they say thus one day compartments seems like a shortsighted planning. I must say I need to test this one day thing for longer period of time and get back to you. Perhaps there is something I am not getting - blonde (I cannot help it.)

     One advice to stop worrying that I absolutely adore and I have been practicing instinctively for years; get busy! Every time I am freaking out about something I am trying to get busy as much as humanly possible. For me it has to be physical work, passive activity such as reading book won't do it. Luckily for me there is always tons of work around my house. Whenever worry or negative thoughts get the best of me I roll up my sleeves and of I go. In addition to worrying there are  moments when I feel sorry for myself - I know its pathetic but I cannot help it. I try to go and help less fortunate to change the perspective. How can I feel sorry for myself if there are people who have no food on the table. My organization of choice is Food Bank, where I have been volunteering since 2011. It puts things in proper perspective...

     All this helps to defuse the worry. But still leaves the question: what about the nights? You can get as busy as you want, and volunteer all day long, but at some point you need to come to bed. These are the worst, as evenings are when the unwanted thinking starts to creep back. Does anyone has a solution to that? Alcohol? Ha! Ha! Ha!  

     On a side note, worry is not pretty. Literally! When I have the periods of worrying my skin seems to get nervous to and not only I get breakouts, but also the color changes into unattractive reddish hue. I have no methods of fighting with this, other than not showing my face in public.

     Have you read this book? Did it help? Kindly let me know in a comment below.


Monday, October 27, 2014

Girl's Priorities And The Dreaded NO

     Morning in my house; fighting with my daughter to get up, while making a breakfast. Drinking coffee with one hand while brushing her hair. Making sure that her backpack is packed well, making sure that my bag is packed at the same time. All of this in a span of 45 minutes. I want to pull my hair out every morning. Once I put her on a bus, it isn't over at all. Quite the opposite it's true as I need to run to school, and try to catch up with whatever it is that I did not manged to do. The list is never ending and the stress is growing. This is exhausting so I started to think if there is any way out of the madness? It seems that with all the demands from outside, even harder demands that I place on myself and forever growing to do list - there is no way out. Or is there?

     Power of "NO!" Indeed, no is a powerful word, nonetheless, it seems that many girls have deleted it from their vocabulary. I know I don't use enough of no myself. It is not easy to say no because:
- we want to be accepted and liked.
- we truly want to help.
- we think we can multitask much better that we actually can.
- the "good girl" syndrome.
- the "super woman" syndrome.
- and lastly how to decide what do say no to?

     For me personally, it has been long road and quite frankly still is the ability to say no. First, it started when I was working three jobs and going to school full time. I was so exhausted that I was afraid I will collapse. Back then, the dreaded no was necessity or otherwise the price would have been my health. Very dramatic I must admit but it started the process of no. Today, I am much better as saying this little word but I still find my obligations are never-ending. I don't have even time to take care of myself properly - me not likey this. So, after another sleepless night, too much apple pie and thinking I figured that not only will I use no much more but also when will I use it.

    World is not perfect, we will never be perfect, our kids and houses will never be perfect regardless of how much we try. The true question here is: What imperfections are the ones that you could live with? In other words; pick your battles. I picked mine.
#1. At this time, my daughter and my schooling is number one.
#2. Building my business and financial education is number two.
#3. Time with my girlfriends.
#4. Chores around the house follow after.
Everything else, oh well, if I manage to find free time I may do it, but please don't rely on it. If I will by some miracle find any free time I intend to use it for myself. I am sorry but I want to be happy and spoiled a little too...

How do you deal with all the demands? Is is easier to say "NO?" 
Please let me know in a comment below. 

Sunday, October 26, 2014

Power Of Girl To Girl Friendship


 "The best way to mend a broken heart is time and girlfriends." said famously Gwyneth Patrow. Power of good girlfriends by your site is enormous. The truth is life is better when a girl has a girlfriends around. In good times the laughs will cascade with your girls and in the worst the tears are not as bad. No one can underestimate the power of girl closeness.

     Boyfriends come and go, girlfriends stay forever - or until you really badly screw up. We are all guilty of that. How often, when a boyfriend shows up on the horizon we become less and less available to our girls? I know I am guilty of that. There is new love, the butterfly feeling in your stomach, the novelty of romance. Who doesn't like romance? We let our self get suck into loveville in no time - the fairy tale story begins. In all of this our girlfriends get occasional update from your paradise and that's about it. Usually, your girls are not happy about being put aside but they will tolerate because they are your friends. The love you dearly and want you to be happy. But let me ask you this does he stop watching Sunday football with him buddies because now you are in his life?

     Friendship is a two-way road, you scratch my back I will scratch yours. This is how it works. Good girlfriends are so rare to come by that is paramount that we care for the precious relationship that we have. In a perfect world that is how would be - sadly we don't live in perfect world. This is from purely my observation: relationships between girls are very complicated. Who hasn't heard or worst lived throught the story of two girls who started as BFF just to end up as frienemies? This is my story, there was a girl at school that I had some sort of friendship - so I thought. Just to learn later that not only she steals my ideas but she goes around and talks about me. One awkward time, we spend the evening from hell together. She would try to stir something up with me on numerous occasions that night. I am older and wiser and I didn't not fall for it. Regardless, my evening was ruined and naturally I was not too pleased. After getting home, the whole situation got me thinking. Why is she trying to belittle me? I would somewhat understand this kind of behavior if we were competing for something life. Let me make it crystal clear : we do not compete at ANY level of life whatsoever. Then I had this thought; there always be the girls who will try to undermine whatever you doing. How often we observe one girl digging holes under another. What this is all about? Being a girl is already hard as it is, we have to fight for jobs, to get paid the same what man, we have to fight with our kids and keep our homes in order. Doing all of this graciously while on perpetual diet to look skinny, with never ending to do list and bag of makeup trick size of a small car. It is required for for our houses to be clean, us to look fabulous, our kids to be geniuses, our coworkers to be able to rely on us - in only 24 hour day. Life of a girl is hard. There is no point of adding to this list nonsense with another girl.

     I, personally, have minimal free time. As a single mother and full-time student my hands are truly full. The very little of free time that I have I want to make it count. I want to spend with my true girlfriends, all this lets stir things up crap can go and get lost - I have no time to entertain nonsense anyway. Life is easier and funnier if you go through it with another girl who understands your ups and downs and possible sideways that life generously throws at us. If, you are lucky to have authentic friendships in your life, make sure that you find the time to cherish them.True girlfriend is precious.

     For inspiration listen to a song by Kenny Rogers - " You Can't Make Old Friends."  
You can listen to the song here

Saturday, October 25, 2014

Do You Love The Skin You're In?

     They say there is no second chance for first impression, and unfortunately they are right. First impressions are very important. It got me thinking what is the equation for first impressions and how do we make it work in our favor? We have two components to the first impression;
1.) how do you feel about yourself that moment and
2.) how the other person feels at the moment.
Let me explain; we all have good hair days and bad hair days. This affects how we feel and as result our self-confidence level. Confident person will make different first impression than the sly one. The other person in the equation may be in crappy mood which will shed the ugly light on your introduction. This is beyond your control so there is no point to worry about the other person in equation.

     That leads to a question: what is it this self-confidence and how do we get it? According to the dictionary: self-confidence is a feeling of trust in one's abilities, qualities, and judgment. Trust in one abilities we usually have, girls are usually less confident in their abilities as we are thought to be modest (how unfortunate). However one thing I know for sure; if I look good I feel confident. This seems to work for other girls too. It is uneasy to feel confident and/or sexy if you look like crap. Murphy's Law the crappier you look the bigger the chance to bump into your ex. 

     In my opinion a good skin is an absolute must to feel good therefore confident. No amount of make up will cover unhealthy skin. In fact, I have been struggling with acne and problematic skin since I can remember. I finally, managed to get the look of my skin somewhat under control. I must admit on the days when my skin cooperates I feel like a star. These days, however are not frequent. After about 20 years ( yes, I am in my 30's) of trying million products, and treatments, countless research and simple trial and error I found a way to make my skin the best in can be.
     This is what I found out: 
Water: number one is drinking water. It can do wonders for your skin and the best it is for free. I must admit that as simple as it sounds it is far from simple. First thing in the morning, as I open my eyes I make a coffee. It's a ritual that I have been following for also about 17 years. Coffee is a diuretic which means that it takes water away from your body. I have to constantly remind myself to drink water. The biggest challenge I found to drink precious liquid is when I am outside. I need an access to the bathroom - bad! Somehow, girls got a short end of the stick here too. How many times I see a guy drinking four beers before he needs to go to the little boys room, I, on the other hand won't even go to half of my first beer when the trips to" powder my nose" start. As a result my water intake is limited, which in turn makes my skin dehydrated The problems start to escalate from there. I am currently working to include more water. I will let you know how this is going. So far not too promising to be honest.
Creams: it may be just me but spending hundreds of dollars did not make a difference in my skin. I noticed that what I do need is simple moisturizing cream with SPF. This is it. It works just as perfect as a cream for $75. That may not be true for everyone but for me it is. I buy a cream for about $10-20 and saved money go towards hanging out with friends...
Serums: this ones I swear by. Love serums! I started to using them about two years ago but I can feel a difference. I think the concentrated nourishment does the trick -my skin absorbs better. 
Diet: this one cannot be undermined. Healthy diet is a must! Fresh fruits and vegetables not only help out the skin but also the body overall. I will write about this in later posts. It is a big subject and I am a nutritionist after all. 

     My confidence comes from how my skin look. This is not true for everyone, my sister confidence comes from how her hair looks. I genuinely think she has tried all hair cosmetics on the market. I, naturally benefit from that as I get the first hand advice what works what does not. Thanks sis :)

    I would love to hear from you:
 Let me know what makes you feel you could take on the world?   

Friday, October 24, 2014

Little Lipstick Goes a Long Way


     Men and women are equal there is nothing that a man can do that a woman cannot do.The premise here is we are equal and so we deserve equal pay. I love idea and I absolutely think that woman or man at the same job should get the same pay. No exceptions!!!
     But are we truly equal? I don't think so. We, the girls, have boobies and hips, we have periods every month and we deliver the babies. The fat content in our bodies is much higher than that of a man. We think differently too. Here is an idea; if we are different, visibly different - why don't we celebrate it?

     Little lipstick on my lips makes me feel little more special, makes me feel more daring, or more seductive. Lips can talk can sing, eat and drink wine. Lips declare love and or war. Lips are the frame for your smile and there is nothing more sexy than smiling girl. You can drive your man crazy with your lips or tell him off. You can pout or send air kisses to your child. Lips can express tons, do millions every day. So celebrate your lips...

     There was time, not so long ago, when lipstick was outdated and was connected to older crowd. I am happy to say that this is no longer true. The lipsticks of today and creamy, moisturizing , luxurious with SPF included.

A guide to lipstick color picks:
Pink is when you want to feel girly and softer.
Red is for here I am, very sexy.
Nude is look into my eyes and soul.
Brownish hues are classic (gotta have perfect white teeth)
Purple is statement I am avangarde - one in a million.

So, girl put your lipstick on... 
My absolute favourite is:
Avon Ultra Color Absolute Lipstick in Pink Renewal. Makes me feel sexy and girly - I absolutely adore it. It is only $9 - cannot beat that.

What is your favorite one? How does it make you feel? Please comment and let me know.

If you are interested to look at this one, or browse other possibilities check the link below: